poof

Atticus to my Scout.

Nathan to my Jules.

Half of the Awesome-Twosome.

But, I guess we broke the rules.



Fish in my bowl.

Ya stole my trademark hug...

But then...tat killed me!

If ya know what I mean...



Am I still yer baby?

Perhaps...

Tat killed me!

Ya know what I mean?



:)

:(

then there's also :$ :| :* :O

tat killed you!...if ya know wat I mean...

Anyone else...but You

You're a part time lover and a full time friend
The monkey on your back is the latest trend
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
I'll kiss you on the brain in the shadow of the train
I'll kiss you all starry eyed my body swingin' from side to side
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Here is the church and here is the steeple
We sure are cute for two ugly people
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Pebbles forgive me, the trees forgive
So why can't you forgive me
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
I will find my niche in your car
With my MP3, DVD, rumble pack guitar
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Up up down down left right left right B A start
Just because we use cheats doesn't mean we're not smart
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
You are always tryin' to keep it real
I'm in love with how you feel
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
We both have shiny happy fits of rage
You want more fans, I want more stage
I don't see what anyone can see im anyone else...but you
Don Quixote was a steel driving man
My name is Adam I'm your biggest fan
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Squinched up your face and did a dance
Shook a little turd out of the bottom of your pants
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
But you


Its a song by the moldy peaches...stays with you...an its just a G and C on the guitar :)

So nice so smart

I was quiet as a mouse
when i snuck into your house
and took roofies with your spouse
in a nit and out a louse
and lice are lousy all the time
they suck your blood drink your wine
say shut up and quit your crying
give it time and you'll be fine

you're so nice and you're so smart
you're such a good friend i hafta break your heart
tell you that i love you then i'll tear your world apart
just pretend i didn't tear your world apart

i like boys with strong convictions
and convicts with perfect diction
underdogs with good intentions
amputees with stamp collections
plywood skinboards ride the ocean
salty noses suntan lotion
always seriously joking
and rambunctiously soft-spoken
i like boys that like their mothers
and i have a thing for brothers
but they always wait til we're under the covers
to say i'm sure glad we're not lovers

you're so nice and you're so smart
you're such a good friend i hafta break your heart
tell you that i love you then i'll tear your world apart
just pretend i didn't tear your world apart

DAMN!!!! and other similar etc...

Damn.
Why is this happening?
Who have I morphed into???

I just...and then...instead of.OMG.
I am freaking out!
Its obvious I know.
But shit, how could I?
Jesus Christ!!!!

I am a drama queen.

You gotta problem with that?

But seriously

eeeverything happens to me.

The quintessential advantages of being me!

On the suraface, I am calm, placid, content, maybe even absolutely still...but on the inside I am running...on a long empty road, all my own, at the speed of thought or maybe more...and I've run past you a million times, in the time it takes us to smile at each other, say hello.

You think black is my favourite colour, with all its mystery, all its intrigue, all its potential to conceal...for I am, in your eyes, an embodiment of these very things.
...But, my favourite colour is actually yellow, the colour of a fresh summer breeze on a balmy day, the colour of instant lemonade.

You seek and find, immense strength in me, the ability to bear, to withstand, to face...insurmountably tragic circumstances.To you, I could face anything,unafraid and live to tell the tale.
...the truth is, I cannot close my eyes in complete darkness, or resist holding my breath before turning blind corners.

You think I am prose...controlled, sober, measured...I am in fact, free-verse, poetry running unbridled, too mercurial, too capricious to be contained by the pages of your book...


It rocks to be me.

There lies
Beyond that
Velvet sky
Past the
Farthest reaches
Of my eye
A place that
Hides me
Deep within
Its solitary
Silence.

And in that
Mysterious,Secret
Place
I find you
On my
Darkest days
Standing, Waiting
Faithful, True
Oh My Shadow
Would I even be
If it weren't
For you.

Absolute Escapist

...that would be me,yeah...can I go now??...You see this thing just blew up in my face, and...[dashes off down imaginary road, before you know what hit you].

But you see, this situation is exactly what I do, literally or metaphorically, and maybe mildly de-exaggeratedly. That all my random gyan hits me at ungodly hours might make my writing a little woozy, so swalpa adjust maadi. But, getting back to the point, I run because its quite simply the easiest thing to do, and I honestly hate confrontations from that abysmal bottom of my heart. I do. I hate them so much I almost develop a facial tick, it can get pretty pathetic really...in my head at least. And the thing is, when you have a caustic tongue, at least in your head, you have enough to deal with in your head as it is, without compounding things further by trying to stick around and clear things out...and oh by the way, my favourite things to run away from are misunderstandings, especially ones in which I come off in a bad light, those suck. I actually run from em coz at some level, I find em absolutely humiliating/tiresome/annoyin etc...slot in appropriate category...despite the fact that they are misunderstandings to begin with...see if its true, you justify and thats simple, but misunderstandings...they can be tricky. So I run. Did I mention I represented school at the district level, for runnin tat is, 3000 m. So I run pretty well, decent stamina. Not big on speed, but wat the hell.

And I've been on the run big-time lately :)... am actually gettin a lil out-of breath, because in life theres no easy one way track, I'm currently running on multiple tracks, in multiple races...and from numerous different 'situations'...for a million different reasons, I wont even admit some of them to myself...that would be 'being in denial', but tats for a different post.

No use asking me to stand my ground and face things, and giving me other fantastic advice, I give my self great advice, but do I follow it? Hell no!

...like I was saying, running in life aint as easy as track...wish it was plain ol track again, was so much simpler...

heres to...quirky

[Disclaimer: This post has been destined by the very nature of its origins to make no sense...so it probably wont]



I have currently abandoned myself to an absolutely shamelessly abject longing for the object of my affections :).Yeah he has his flaws...probably, and is definitely too tall for me and according to two very good friends o mine not smart enough for me...but did I mention he is gorgeous...that he has no idea he happens to be the object of my affections (ok maybe he has some idea, but guys can be pretty thick, you know)...is a minor concern obviously...oh but the journey my friend has been...filmi, very filmi, full of stolen glances and gazes held across crowded canteens, and wondering what each others' names are, and at one point...finding it incredibly romantic that I might never know. But damn folks kept yelling it all over the place and I heard it, so the big mystery element surrounding him is sorta diminished now. The first time I saw him, that he thought I was cute was obvious(wheee!), it still is, most times anyway. But then again, he is probably only putting sight, which is a pity really, because for someone who has grown up on a consistently bollywood diet(namely moi)...all tat filminess totally totally works(unfortunately)...and did I mention we dont know each other, thats very essentially Bollywood too.
Now before you label me a psychopath and stop speaking to me when you meet me, chill, it was probably random boredom ( or the fact tat we're both really pretty :P) tat led us down this essentially harmless road anyway.

Hmmm...I cant exactly say much more without actually coming out and naming the dude...so...oh well I guess I'll end this post. Didnt serve much purpose...But wat can I say...he leaves me (and tats ME!!!) tongue-tied...

yeah i have it baaaad...heaven help me

That essential question

Swing crazy
Between extremes
Torrid high
Despondent low
And in between
There lay
A 'Why?'
The Answer to which
We couldn't
Know
Along the edges
Of its
Steep ascent
We rose unfettered,
Our shackled wills
Were innocence...
Wrapped in a hurricane,
Driving us Forth
Holding us still.
And we swung
Between
Crazy extremes
Torrid high
Despondent low
Hopelessly distant
Scaldingly close
Have we been neither
...or have we been both.

damn...

sometimes...you gotta do the right thing,
whether or not its the thing you wanna do...

damn

p.s: therez also you gotta see it like it actually is...another damn!

...

Who are you
That haunts my dreams
And hides within
My shadows...
That wanders in
My yesterdays,
Keeps me
From my tomorrows...

Does the greatness of art lie in its ability to be understood ?

Some of most celebrated works of art, those that elicit the most profound reactions in each of us, possess elements which elude comprehension. In many cases it is this elusive quality that sets a work of art apart from the rest in its genre. The 'Monalisa' or the Jaconde, one of the most famous paintings in the world possesses this very quality. Is the lady smiling?...or almost?...is a question even connosieurs of art are divided in opinion over.Even the landscape that is the backdrop of the painting has been the subject of many discussions.The painting also has several contradicting elements interwoven into it- the hands of the subject are relaxed, but the rest of her posture suggests a formal rigidity, which is also at odds with her smile.It has been said that the Monalisa reflects to each person his or her own current emotional state.These elements of the painting cannot be understood by the uninitiated, only experienced.
Therefore it is my opinion that art in any form need not be understood to be appreciated. Each artistic creation is a rendition of a concept, an ideaology, an emotion, an event...sometimes an amalgamation of all of these. A layperson cannot be expected to understand or even recognize the interplay between these elements in art, only experience them in their completeness, as a whole.It is not necessary, in order to enjoy a creme brulee to know how its prepared, to savour its perfect flavour, and respond to that stimulus is enough.
It can be argued that to understand a work art along with all its details, to understand its origins, its meaning and the intricacies of a genre make for a deeper, more satisfying experience. But, general existing trends contradict this contention.Most people today prefer modern art, which is more abstract than its conventional counterparts be it in sculpture, painting, photography or any other medium. While conventional art forms usually elicit standard responses, modern art is viewed, understood and differently by different people. In traditional forms, a lake is a lake, a lady is a lady and the picture a flower is just that, the picture of a flower, but in modern art, what a painting depicts is not as easily discernible, because of the simple reason that in these art forms, entities are not made to resemble their actual images. They meanings of such works of art are implied. This makes them harder to understand. But,an increasing number of people prefer modern art forms to their traditional counterparts. This alone refutes the argument that art has to be understood to be great.
Most great art and most works of art that have garnered attention through the generations have not been understood by the masses.They have been appreciated and lauded based mostly on their aesthetic appeal as a whole, the overall reaction they elicit from a person observing them, be it a symphony or a painting.And perhaps their greatness lies therein.

Who am I...now

Who am I now?...I know I am not who I used to be, but save the knowledge of what I am not, what am I. I am a stranger to myself, as shocked by my actions, by my thoughts, my emotions as you are. I can predict my reactions as well as you could. I know they will not be what they would have been...then...but what will they be now? I do not know...

Who am I now?...that girl in the mirror, I still consider my old face my own...find it difficult to accept the changes, they do not belong to me.

My Insomniac

Trudging through the light of day
Half awake and unaware
Waiting for the night to come
And cloak him in its soothing folds
Of solitary darkness...
He'll walk past, but you will not see
The man that he once used to be
You'll see him come, then watch him go
My maddened lost insomniac.

What troubles him he will not say
Events from an ancient age
Things he says you must remember
'They happened only yesterday'
In his ancient language- long forgotten
He'll tell you truths you'll never know
You'll see him come, then watch him go,
My maddened lost insomniac...

Frantic socail life?

She:Man...its sooo tiring. Why do I have to have such a frantic social life!

He:Have a lot of friends huh?(smiling...genuinely earnestly curious...or a great actor!)

She:I guess!(rolls her eyes)

Me:...(in my head...):Um...no...she's just schizophrenic...

Pursuit of Happyness

There are moments in time, when I wish I could sprout wings and fly away, destination undecided, when I actually feel restricted, constrained by my body. These are usually the kinda days when I smile like an idiot at vague strangers on the street and don't even care that they probably think I'm loony.Today was that kinda day, you didn't relly need to know that by the way.Just random gyan...

Watched this beeeeautiful brilliant animation movie called Balto in the morning, which is about this part-wolf mongrel that saved the Alaskan town of Nome in the 1930s by successfully delivering a package of diphtheria vaccine...it's seen through the eyes of a child who was actually saved back then...which makes it that much more personal and that much more touching.And I'm a sucker for happy endings and heroes...and dogs...so I genuinely loved this film...
that I had chocolate fudge to go with it might have made things that much better...

And then there was pursuit of happyness...and no its actually meant to be spelt that way...the verb reference. There is one question asked in the middle of this movie that really got me...

In the USA's Declaration of Independence, this statement actually exists

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.


Why is it called the 'pursuit' of happiness...did they know that it would have to be pursued? that the attainment of it was not a certainty?


What is true actual happiness?...It's usually just that one moment when you realise that your current circumstances, which(if) you perceive them as constraining are going to change. Just that one moment when you've gotten that job, gotten into that college you wanted to go to, closed a deal...its actually a momentary thing- happiness. Because, lets face it working at that firm of studying at that college is not really gift-wrapped eternal bliss...

and if this true, why do we pursue it at such a frantic pace?Is it true?

Shoebox Rhapsody

She found a box
at the back of her cupboard
a brown shoe box
sealed up with tape
and in it was the class of '91
smilin back in sepia tone

it was dusty
with the labels peelin off
a brown shoe box
sealed up with tape
and in it was a book o recipies
of things her momma used to make

ch:
[Her life ain't outta the ordinary
She's your regular nine to five
And petty things that make her worry
And little things that make her smile
Her life ain't outta the ordinary
So I'll rhapsodize about
Memories in a shoebox

Memories fittin in shoeboxes
And lives that fit in picture frames
Picking up your phone and smiling
To familiar forgotten names
Memories fittin in a shoebox
Baby...you're playin a losin game ]

She found a diary
she'd written long ago
forgotten letters
from forgotten flames
the first valentine she ever got
with spangles all over her name

She found a box
at the back of her cupboard
a forgotten box
on the corner rack
she'd packed away everything that mattered
and then forgotten how to unpack

[Her life ain't outta the ordinary
She's your regular nine to five
And petty things that make her worry
And little things that make her smile
Her life ain't outta the ordinary
So I'll rhapsodize about
Memories in a shoebox

Memories fittin in shoeboxes
lives that fit in picture frames
pickin up your phone and smilin
to familiar forgotten names
memories fittin in shoeboxes...
...Baby...you're playin a losin game ]

Mary

It was just
a seedy pub
Your average
dimlit nightclub
but in a corner
they had a raised stage
and Mary standin on it.

They said she looked
like your average plain jane
she had creases
at the corners of her smile
but i thought
she was easy on the eyes
Mary Mary Mary
she looked so fine.

It was just
a seedy pub
all flat beer
and used up cigarette stubs
but in a corner
they had raised stage
and Mary singin on it.

Last year they said
she'd had a daughter
and since then
no man had ever got her
but oh she was so
easy on the eyes
Mary Mary Mary
she was so fine.

So in that
dimlit nightclub
just your seedy
average pub.
I sat at the edge
of that raised stage
pretendin she's gonna be mine
Mary Mary Mary
she was so fine

It was just
a seedy pub
your average
dimlit nightclub
but in a corner
they had a raised stage
with Mary standin on it.

Straighten up and fly right!

Written by Nat King Cole and Irving Mills

A buzzard took a monkey for a ride in the air,
The monkey thought that everything
was on the square.
The buzzard tried to throw the monkey
off OF his back,
The monkey grabbed his neck and said,
"Now listen, Jack..."

Straighten up and fly right,
Straighten up and stay right
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top.
Ain't no use in divin',
What's the use in jivin'?
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top.

The buzzard told the monkey,
"You are chokin' me.
Release your hold and I will set you free."
The monkey looked the buzzard right
dead in the eye and said,
"Your story's so touching, but it sounds
just' like a lie."

Straighten up and fly right
Straighten up and stay right
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top.

(Take it away, boys!)

Straighten up and fly right,
Straighten up and stay right
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top.
Ain't no use in divin',
Ain't no good in jivin'!
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow - your - top.

Fly right!




hehehe.Kinda glad I have someone to say that to me. Your perspective needs a lil shakin up sometimes, reminded what matters and what doesn't, and why hanging on is important, and why to what you want, and why not to what you're supposed to want, and why its ok to be you, without guilt, which is stupid enough to begin with.
Someone relly wise once told me its hard enough to be yourself, dont compound your miseries trying to be someone else.
yup.

light n easy

could you handle sacrifice
could you handle all their lies
could you handle true surrender
could you handle deep

didn't think so

so i'll give you...
light n easy listenin
light n easy everything
throw in a little
standard talkin
light n easy
some moonwalkin
light n easy

and i'll give you
light n easy listenin
light n easy hear me sing
i'll play you some mellow music
forget about the notes within
light n easy listenin
light n easy

could you handle retribution
could you handle their confusion
could you handle desolation
could you handle true

didn't think so

so i'll give you
light n easy listenin
light n easy
go on and sing
light n easy...